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Joke of the Day
"My dad's the real winner of this election... He passed away last week."
Next Joke
"It's colder than..."
"My friend got a job as a metronome. I said, is that a regular thing?"
"Why did the dog's friends send her home from the bar when she started to act strange? They thought she might have been slipped a woofie."
"Jesus Christ fed 2,000 people with 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish but Adolf Hitler made 6 million Jews toast."
"Nate: ""Hey what's the weather like out there?"" Kate: ""I don't know. I'll tell you when it clears."""
"Finding out how big of a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles fan I truly am was understandably pretty tough for my daughters, Raphael & Leonardo."
"When I want something a little healthier than an ice cream sandwich, I usually go for an ice cream salad."
"How many computer scientists does it take to change a lightbulb? None, that's a hardware problem"
"I came into some money yesterday. I couldn't find the tissues."