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Joke of the Day

"You know what they called vegetarians 300 years ago.... Poor People..."

"What font is alphabet soup produced in? Times New Ramen"

"Never trust an atom. Actually, it's probably fine. They only make up about 4% of everything."

"Q: Why is a train like a stick of gum? A: One goes choo-choo; the other goes chew-chew."

"For a week I've been telling my kid ""If your cough isn't better tomorrow, you're going to the doctor!"" and it finally worked. (She died.)"

"Ooopppsss Q: What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? A: You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish"

"What's Gordon Ramsey's favourite movie? It's Fucking Frozen!"

"If a guy stares at your boobs, just stare at his d!ck ... maybe squint a little bit"

"Not all that glitters is gold. Take, for instance, glitter."

"Who cares about the new GTA when you can sit down and enjoy the new testament"