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Joke of the Day
"Q: Why is a train like a stick of gum? A: One goes choo-choo; the other goes chew-chew."
Next Joke
"I see your ""long walks on the beach"" and I raise you ""long Segway rides on beach"" *peels off on beach throwing sand in dates face*"
"Condoms A man walks into a shop to buy some condoms. The cashier asks 'would you like a bag with that?' To which the man replies 'No thanks, she's not that ugly'."
"Looks like someone spent more time at the gym than in English class..."
"I invented a new joke today I invented a new word today Plagiarism"
"I can already hear Monday morning whispering Go F***Yourself in my ear."
"*kicks house door down* I SAID HAVE YOU ACCEPTED JESUS INTO YOUR LIFE?"
"Well, it's Feb 6th 2012 and there's no meat flavored cigarettes. I guess that book of predictions I made in 5th grade was bullshit."
"I was really pissed at my boyfriend for not calling me all day. Then I remembered he's imaginary. So I'm good."
"Walked right by an ex-girlfriend today. Not on purpose, I just didn't recognize her with her mouth closed."