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Joke of the Day

"People are writing condolences on my Grandma's Facebook that sound more like Yelp reviews of her. Great woman, very loving, 5/5 stars"

"How did the octopus lovers walk down the road? Arm in arm in arm in arm in arm in arm in arm in arm in arm."

"Guys: Every two weeks, tell your lady that her new hairstyle looks great!!!! You might not notice it...... but trust me, they changed it. You can thank me later. "

"Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? Neither have they."

"What's the difference between a yoghurt and the USA? If left for 400 years, the yoghurt will develop a culture."

"Q: Why is Bill Clinton diverting federal funds from improving schools to improving jails? A: Because when his term is through he won't be going to school."

"""What do we want!"" ""Hearing aids!"" ""When do we want them!"" ""Hearing aids!"""

"Me to 4 yr old niece: your shoes are on the wrong feet Niece looks down and says: I don't have any other feet Outsmarted again."

"Every time I read news about ISS Im like what did ISIS do this time... half way through the article... how the hell did they get to space. Oh wait damn you dyslexia!! edit: joke"

"How did the hipster burn his tongue ? cos he drank he coffee before it was cool..."