18590

Joke of the Day

"Bro. It's not ladies man, it's ladies' man. Chicks dig a dude who can navigate a plural possessive."

"I can prove to you that electronics are powered by smoke... by the irrefutable fact that they stop working when the smoke leaks out!"

"I just want to be important enough that someone unexpectedly puts a cup of coffee in my hand, which I gratefully accept with only a nod."

"I love you so much that I would wait for your photo to load on my slow Internet connection."

"Did you hear about the plane that crashed on the way to the ginger convention? Thankfully there were no souls on board."

"I would love to start working out, but I'm beefing up for my ""before"" picture."

"A man walks into a psychiatrist's office... completely naked, but wrapped in plastic wrap. The psychiatrist looks him and down and says...I can clearly see your nuts."

"Body language can be so subtle that only an intuitive person can read your mood. Body slams, I have found, are far more direct."

"did you know it takes 3 sheep to make a wool sweater? It's amazing. I didn't even know they could knit! waaaaaaka waka."

"Where does Vladimir keep his shit? In his poo tin"