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Joke of the Day

"Just remember Mom, you can't spell ""disappointment"" without ""appointment"" which reminds me I have to be at Hooters at 9 for my interview."

"Anybody hear about those two car antennas that got married? Supposedly the wedding was alright but the reception was great ;)"

"I have a strange attraction to bananas. I don't know why, I just find it apeeling."

"Life stops when you stop dreaming, hope ends when you stop believing, love ends when you stop caring, friendship ends when you stop sharing."

"Why is God depressed? Imagine...*You* Being God, the Lord, Him... But imagine us."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Butcher ! Butcher who ? Butcher your arms around me !"

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb and one to suck my dick."

"I have the greatest dad ever Every year he got so mad when Santa didn't bring me presents"

"What kind of tea does an anarchist drink? Cheap generic iced tea. Because proper tea is theft."

"I'm sorry I put a collar on your baby. I thought it was a Pug."