185706

Joke of the Day

"I was talking to my friend earlier. I thought, ""Why on earth are you called Earlier?"""

"The Fed is thinking of minting a new coin with Obama's face on it It'll be worth 60 (.60 = 3/5)"

"I'm so broke... I gotta jerk off the dog to feed the cat"

"I call my girlfriend Dumbledore Because she's the real headmaster"

"Why did the masseuse give her lawyer a happy ending? She thought he could come in handy. (I'll let myself out)"

"Be careful, there is also plenty of mentally unstable fish in the sea."

"I tried being polite by holding the door open for a lady She kept yelling, ""I'm peeing in here!"" What a bitch."

"A saying of love. If you love her, let her go. If she returns, anal."

"me: can I buy you a drink? girl: sorry [holds up martini] already got one me: [spits in it] How about now?"

"Why were piggy banks made? To keep the Jews away from the money"