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Joke of the Day

"You want to know a neat trick to get yourself to stop being annoyed by a baby crying? Close the lid to the dumpster."

"Got asked to help unlock a PDF file today..... I said stop wasting your time, we should be concentrating on locking them up."

"A blind man Walks into a bar A table and a chair"

"What idiot called it removing a curse and not a hexagon?"

"My kids aren't going to believe in Santa. They're going to believe in a magical Unicorn that barfs the presents under the tree."

"What does a neckbeard call his imaginary girlfriend and his disease? Ma'lady"

"My attempt at a joke? My mum is going through Labour and my dad says: ""Could Ukip already?"""

"What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The Wheelchair!"

"After all this Starbucks cup controversy, if Taco Bell was smart, they'd start serving their burritos in little cardboard mangers"

"Hey Chumbawamba, we kept you down."