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Joke of the Day

"The Tin Man carries around an axe because he is constantly afraid Ironman is going to hit on his wife."

"My grandfather told me he closed one eye whenever he saw a jew in the good old days... He was a sniper"

"I can't remember my Password i can remember my Password being ""Mypenis"" but it keeps telling me that my password is too short :("

"""none of your ridiculous drink recipes tonight, ok dan?"" I promise [later] *stuffing flatbread into blender* WHO WANTS A PITA COLADA"

"I'm listening to U2 acapella recordings. Just needed to take The Edge off"

"Well-known lodging chain announced it was creating a line of nofrills hotels. The only way you'll see a chocolate on the pillow now is if the last guest was eating an M&M."

"What's Brown and sticky? A stick"

"My friend told me this one. 18+ inside, nsfw. 19"

"I masturbated in the shower... I just wanted to come clean. Came up with this earlier, I guess it could've been relevant in /r/showerthoughts"

"What do a woman and a grenade have in common? Pull off the ring and the house is gone."