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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the guy who fell in a vat at the eyeglass factory? He really made a spectacle of himself."

"Urgent!!!! hey! I'm sending this message via internet explorer so it might be slow... but quick! There is a plane heading for the twin towers! call somebody before it is too"

"China's number 1 brand of Protein? I-Whey-Whey"

"My subaru wasn't working. How awd."

"I learned how to yodel -Knock knock. --Who's there? -Yoda lady. --Yoda lady who? -Good job yodeling!"

"Helen Keller walks into a bar Then a table, then a stool..."

"I am conducting a survey to see who is the most awesome person on Facebook. To find out who it is read the first two words of this status."

"Thanks to me, you'll probably start seeing 'For Display Only' signs on the toilets at Home Depot."

"What's an owl's favorite subject? Owlgebra"

"I hate it when crazy people say Poseidon told them they are the ninja turtles and I don't even remember I told them so."