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Joke of the Day

"What's white, black, and red all over? A race war."

"What's the russian royalty's favorite type of fish? Czar-dines!"

"Massaging the shoulders of the person in front of you at the Redbox machine will usually help them make up their mind faster."

"""Science HAS gone too far,"" I whisper, gazing out across the sea of boneless chickens slithering through the farmyard. The Colonel laughs."

"If science is so great why hasn't it invented chocolate that has negative calories?"

"Why do parrots carry umbrellas? So they don't become polly-saturated!"

"A skeleton walks into a bar.. Something something beer and mop.."

"Q: Did you hear that NASA recently put a bunch of Holsteins into low earth orbit? A: They called it the herd shot 'round the world."

"What were the Crocodile Hunters last words? ""You Irwin some you Irlose some"" Then he dieded."

"You can use lemon juice to get the goat's blood out of the drapes. #householdhints"