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Joke of the Day

"If science is so great why hasn't it invented chocolate that has negative calories?"

"Did you hear about the girl who gave out handjobs to electricians, plumbers, mechanic, you name it? She was a right Jack off all trades."

"What is the difference between 69 and an ambush ? With 69 you see the cunt coming at you."

"What is the worst part about being socially anxious and trying to tell a joke to a group of people? You'll probably punch up the fuck line."

"My dancing style can best be described as ""Guy On Maury Who Just Found Out He Isn't The Father."""

"Political analyst said the way to defeat ISIS is to cripple them financially so maybe we can sneak into Syria and build them a Whole Foods."

"What did one saggy boob say to the other? We better perk up or somebody is going to think were nuts."

"I just saw a stage show about puns... It was a play on words."

"No I don't have anything smaller than a twenty. You should. You're the one who's running a store."

"I named my dick money... 'Cause women love to blow it"