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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between jelly and jam? You ever try to jelly it in her ass?"

"I feel like a mentally disabled person with an Australian accent would be the most annoying thing ever."

"I use to have mad cow Disease But I'm alright Nooooooooooooooooooow."

"what do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator"

"I stepped on a grape once. It didn't scream, but it did let out a little whine."

"Doctor's wife was told she was terrible in bed. After coming home late, the Doctor accused her of cheating. She responded, ""I wasn't out cheating, I was out getting a second opinion."""

"What's the difference between herpes and mono? You get one from snatching a kiss."

"I'm just now realizing most blink-182 lyrics don't make any sense I guess this is growing up..."

"If sex with 3 people is called a 3 some, sex with 2 people is called a 2 some.. Then I know why everyone calls you handsome."

"One day, you wake up and everyone has a number over their heads. The number is counting down by the second. Eventually, someone's number reaches zero, and.... They sneeze. Their number resets."