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Joke of the Day

"Q: How many British navy Officers does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one but it takes him seven weeks to get there."

"Why does Bruce Willis live in America and watch porn? Because he wants to live free and die hard"

"I planted some flowers, but they never grew. Should have seen it coming. The package did warn that they were pansies."

"How do you tell if your girlfriend's ticklish? You give her a test tickle."

"What do you call bug mating? INSEX"

"My girlfriend called me a pervert... but what does she know, she's only 13 years old."

"Turning vegan is a big missed steak."

"Facebook should change its name to Acquaintance Birthday Reminder"

"What does it mean to come home to a man who'll give you some love and tenderness? You're in the wrong house."

"Whats the difference between Gabrielle Giffords and her husband....... Her husband flies in a bullet whereas bullets fly in to her.... too soon?"