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Joke of the Day

"Why is it so hard for men to get on Christian Mingle? Only women get a ""SUBMIT"" button."

"I'm speeding because I have to get there before I forget where I'm going."

"What's the only thing an Irish person can hold on to? A grudge."

"Fast and Furious [NSFW] I asked my girlfriend to give me road head and we got into an accident. I guess next time I should be the one driving."

"The real reason Jesus died The criminal before him suffered from a deadly skin condition. Jesus died from cross-contamination"

"Why did the Wise Man get 25 to life? Myrrhder"

"What do you yell at a Muslim striptease? ""Show me your nose!"""

"The only time my car goes 0-100 real fast. Is when it's sitting in broad daylight on a summer day."

"IT:have you deleted your cookies? Me:yea the chocolate ones. There may be some raisin ones left IT:is there somebody else I could talk to?"

"My friend asked me to change a dollar bill to four quarters... ...so I tore it in half twice."