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Joke of the Day

"The real reason Jesus died The criminal before him suffered from a deadly skin condition. Jesus died from cross-contamination"

"Me: hope ur soccer team wins the great fork American: What Me: the good plate American: the super bowl Me: i knew it was a kitchen something"

"What did the rising sun say to the morning dew? You will be mist."

"Whoever said white people can't jump... Obviously hasn't heard of 9/11"

"My 4yr old daughter just charged me $47 for a fake cake she cooked in her pretend oven. I laughed. ... She stared at me until I paid her."

"What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese."

"Other than Superman and the homeless has anyone used a phone booth in the last 10 years?"

"I can't stand people who are indirect You know who you are"

"I found a satanic puzzle in the toilet today. It was a loo cipher"

"I didn't want to believe my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.. But when I got home, all the signs were there."