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Joke of the Day
"Why did the gay man get fired from his job at the sperm bank? He was drinking on the job."
Next Joke
"The French Navy Q: Why does the new French navy have glass-bottomed boats? A: So they can see the old French navy."
"ME: [in santa costume, covered in chimney soot] that was hard. how does santa do it WIFE: well santas not real, hun ME: [drops cookie] WHAT"
"What do you get if you cross 50 Shades of Grey with Blurred Lines? A greydient"
"What do you call a woman with one leg longer than the other? Ilene. What if she is Chinese? Irene."
"What is the Mexicans favorite credit card company? Capital Juan"
"I shouldn't play with Legos? It says ""Ages 7 & Up"". 30 is higher than 7. Instead of calling me immature, you need to go take a math class."
"GOP threatens to shutdown government unless Obama changes color of skin."
"[first date] I'm sorry, I fiddle when I get nervous ""That's okay"" Yeah.... *jams out epic fiddle solo for the rest of the date*"
"If Twitter was invented by a woman, The character limit would be 10,000 characters."