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Joke of the Day

"Going to How to Train Your Dragon tomorrow... Or marriage guidance counselling as the wife calls it."

"Say what you want about the Aztecs.... ... but they have alot of heart. (i'm not funny)"

"The secret service found a dildo in the Oval Office Signing off on another executive order."

"Saw a black guy today with a black guy. Did he get punched in the eye?"

"Do you know why you dont get along with cassiopeia? Cause she is petrifying gays."

"I walked out of a club with a girl last night. She slipped her hand inside my jeans, squeezed my cock and said, ""Yours or mine?"" I said, ""That's mine."""

"What's the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute. The prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again Edit-1 hopefully she/he washes it"

"My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well actually he said ""less McDonald's"" but I'm pretty sure I know what he meant"

"Did you know 80% of chinese have cataracts? The other 20% drive Rincolns."

"What do you call a cross between an elephant and a rhino? 'Ell if i know."