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Joke of the Day
"Charles Dickins walks into a bar and orders a Martini. The bartender says, Olive or Twist?"
Next Joke
"I always carry a picture of my wife and children in my wallet. It reminds me why there's no fucking money in there."
"Things that kinda rhyme... Very Hungry Caterpillar Scary Money Counterfeiter"
"Old Chinese proverb: Rape impossible! Woman with skirt up run faster than man with trousers down!"
"There was an M&M in my spaghetti.. He was an M Pasta"
"Friend: I'm surprised to see you eating a salad. Me: *empties bag of chocolate chips over it*"
"I just saw my son with his penis in a bag of pistachios. He's fucking nuts."
"My grandson asked me what it's like to be married so I told him to leave me alone. When he did, I asked him why he was ignoring me"
"I bought some shoes from a drug dealer, I don't know what they're laced with but I've been tripping all day..."
"1.Open Facebook 2.Search for a pic with 4 girls 3.Coment: ""You 3 look so pretty!"" 4.Enjoy"