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Joke of the Day

"A construction worker decided to go to a bar for a few drinks He got hammered."

"Let's play the lion and the lion tamer Open your mouth and I'll give you the meat"

"What do you call the rough parts of Paris? La Ba-ghetto"

"There is nothing worse that realizing the vacation you planned is going to be the same week as her period."

"Apparently, you can only say ""look at you! You got so big!"" to children. Adults tend to get offended."

"Why is ink an unwise investment? Because it's a dyeing industry. - This is too obvious a joke to be original, but it came to me during my econ class, and so it's original to me!"

"My son asked what it is like to be married, so I deleted all the music on his ipod except 1 song."

"My mate asked me why I have sex noises saved on my iPod. I said, ""It's for sound effects during sex."" He asked, ""Your wife a bit quiet in the sack?"" I replied, ""No, I work in a morgue."""

"[used car] ME: my credit's bad SALESMAN: k ME: i'm a criminal SALESMAN: no law against that ME: i'm on the run SALESMAN: then you need a car"

"How do you pick up a jew? With a dustpan of course!"