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Joke of the Day

"was going to make a joke about science but I know for I wont get a reaction..."

"A Spanish, Greek and Portuguese man go to a bar. Who pays for the drinks? The German!"

"Saw a Justin Bieber CD taped to a wall. You better believe I took it, you never know when you will need a piece of tape."

"I don't always have a cool Facebook status, but when I do, an older relative ruins it with a lame comment."

"I knew it was time to vacuum when the baby rolled over and looked like an everything bagel."

"What happened to the frog's car? It was toad."

"I didn't want to believe that my dad was fired for stealing from the transportation department But when I got home, the signs were all there."

"Just saw a snake slither through my backyard, so if anyone wants a house in Houston, it's yours."

"GF and I went to see Dark Knight Rises our 9th date. Dates can be summarised dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner Batman."

"[office meeting] BOSS: Printer ink is costing us a ton. Any ideas on how to cut costs? SQUID: *looks up from phone* Why y'all lookin' at me?"