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Joke of the Day
"Meatloaf collapses on stage... ...due to dehydration. Changing name to Beef Jerky."
Next Joke
"Q: Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? A: Because she was a woman."
"Why are there so many cat photos online? Because Asians love to take a photo of their food before eating."
"Katie Price's first task in Celebrity.... Katie Price's first task in Celebrity Big Brother is to not get pregnant or married in the next three weeks."
"PSA: If you're about to be arrested, climb to the roof of a nearby court. You are now 'above the law' & literally can't get in trouble ever"
"""Retweet! Retweet!"" yelled the German Commander as we invaded Normandy"
"Just remember, every time someone misuses the word ""epic"" Zooey Deschanel covers another Smiths song on her ukulele."
"John Oliver ? that guy's so last week"
"I will never vaccinate my child. I'd rather a doctor or nurse do it."
"There's a secret menu item at McDonald's but you can't order it, you can only get it by acting like a jerk. (Cheeseburger wiped on shoe)"