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Joke of the Day

"Instead of presents, give your kids ""presence."" Then explain how homonyms can be hilarious. Then leave forever."

"What does Salvador Dali have for breakfast? Surreal."

"a man walked into a bar nd he asked for a drink of whiskey and da barman sed, ""do u want whiskey or whisky?"" nd da man sed, ""i dont hear da diffrence!!!!"""

"me: ""what is a librarian's favourite food?"" dog: me: ""SHUSHI lmao"" dog: [starts putting his toys in suitcase]"

"I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather Not screaming and yelling like everyone else in the car."

"What do you ask when an Indian comes up in a conversation? ""Dot or no dot"""

"Man to very beautiful airhostess:- ""What's your name?"" Air hostess:- ""Eva Benz.."" Man :- ""Lovely name...any relation to Mercedes Benz?"" Air hostess:- (smiling) ""maintenance cost is same"" :D"

"The most valuable thing you can make is a mistake- you can't learn anything from being perfect."

"Grand Theft Auto reminds me of Florida. Except one lets you shoot people without consequence and the other is a video game."

"Why can't you tell Walter White a knock knock joke? Because HE is the one who knocks."