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Joke of the Day

"My Jewish friend told me about Krav Maga.... To which I replied ""is that some sort of a legal term?"""

"What is dead on its back, 100 feet in the air? A dead centipede."

"I went to a lingerie shop I picked up some pants and asked them server if they were satin He said ""no they're new"""

"Playboy is starting a new magazine specifically for married men. It has the same centerfold every month!"

"2 blondes are on their way to Disneyland... they see a sign reading ""Disneyland left"". So they cried a bit and headed home."

"I learned a very important lesson at Mount Rushmore. The best presidents were stoned."

"Chuck Norris was bitten by a snake After several day of agonising pain, the snake finally died."

"I hate it when you gain 10 pounds for a role... And then remember that you're not an actor."

"What happened in France? Did they release a GTA Go?"

"Emperor Sleepoleon, we urge you to change your name to appear less lazy to your people. Oui, I shall dial it back, BUT ONLY SLIGHTLY"