181973

Joke of the Day

"Sure, white people can't say the n-word, but.... At least we can say, ""Hey dad"" and ""Thanks for the warning officer."""

Next Joke
 
"Have you heard about the new Scientologist car? It's got cruise control..."
"Did you know that when you meet an Indian you can CHOOSE not to mention slumdog millionaire?"
"Twilight werewolf Taylor Lautner turns 18 today. That makes him 126 in dog years so, unfortunately, we're going to have to put him to sleep."
"What's the difference between a pimple and a Catholic Priest? A pimple waits until you're 13-years-old before coming on your face."
"I'm a polymorphic alien... ...and I have taken shape of this text, and at this very moment I am having sex with your eyeballs and by the smile on your face I can tell that you are enjoying it :)"
"A faster than light neutrino! Knock Knock! Who's there? New. New who?"
"I beat a Prius today... Thank goodness I had on my running shoes."
"[Therapist appt.] Hub: She doesn't have her priorities straight. *Me on FaceTime with a petting zoo in the background* ""That's not true"""
"[Mary Magdalene, in bed with someone else after Jesus dies] Him: You said his name again."