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Joke of the Day

"There should be a millennial edition of Monopoly where you just walk around the board paying rent, never able to buy anything."

"jok Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. Maria: This is it. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? Class: Maria did."

"To impress a woman in the workplace, ignore her body and compliment her IDEAS. Example: Sharon it was a great idea to wear that tight skirt"

"Someone stole my Microsoft Office and they're gonna pay. You have my Word."

"If at first you don't succeed try try a gun"

"The Buddhist idea of Nirvana literally translates to ""Blown Out"" Typically in reference to something like a candle, but occasionally to Kurt Cobain's brains."

"The reason your car won't go over 60 in the city is because you haven't yelled ""HOLD ON!"" yet."

"What do you call a black mage? A Negro-mancer"

"(WW1 1915) ENGLISH GENERAL: Plan? ENGLISH LIEUTENANT: Well, the trenches can be used to- ENGLISH MAJOR: to symbolise man's emptiness, yes..."

"[Joker has Robin tied up] ""If you want to see the Boy Wonder alive, come to the old-"" ""Nope. Also he's allergic to peanuts. Like real bad."""