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Joke of the Day

"MAJOR TOM: Tell my wife I love her very much... GROUND CONTROL: She knows. MAJOR TOM: Wait... Is she with you now? GROUND CONTROL: Bye, Tom."

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"I saw a woman in the supermarket pick up her kids by the hair Certainly raised a few eyebrows"
"What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my dick down your throat."
"Q: How many apples grow on a tree? A: All of them! ARRRRGHHHH FUCK YOU POPSICLE STICK JOKE"
"C-sections are like the Digiorno of pregnancy..... It isn't delivery, but it still tastes like one."
"New dating app for German Catholic Priests Kinder"
"Bill Clinton: ""I sure hope Hillary gets better interns than I did..."" ""All of mine sucked"""
"Cocktail bar.. Wife went to a cocktail bar, she asked the barman for a double entendre ..,so he gave her one."
"Why hasn't bigfoot ever gone to prison? Because he has only been convicted mythdemeanors."
"What do you call a fat person on a high horse? Ellen Pao."
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