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Joke of the Day

"Why shouldn't you laugh when a black man falls off his bike? It could be ~~yours~~ your bike. EDIT: Spelling."

"How does a Cub Scout become a Boy Scout? By eating a Brownie."

"I always cry before talking to attractive girls Any tips against pepper spray?"

"What happens when you step on an oily asian? Better not say. I feel like I'm already treading on a slippery slope."

"I've only been in jail for 5 minutes and I've already been raped twice. My uncle doesn't fuck around when playing Monopoly."

"The Pope is elevating Pete Carrol! He's the only person that can make 20,000,000 people shout out JESUS CHRIST in unison!"

"The last time anything got banged on my bed, it was my little toe against the leg."

"As a kid I always wanted to be a conductor ... Now I think it requires too much training."

"Why God impregnated Mary? Because instead of ""Oh Joseph! Cum in me!"", Mary said ""Oh God! Cum in me!"""

"Anyone remember this from the Austin Powers commercial? ""If you see one movie this summer... see Starwars... but if you see two movies see Austin Powers...."""