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Joke of the Day
"What do colleges and penises have in common? They're both long and hard, unless you're Asian."
Next Joke
"If you mix taco bell sauce into your ramen.. It tastes exactly like poverty."
"My moral compass just spins."
"Operator: ""9-1-1 please hold..."" Me: ""Ok. Hey, stop stabbing me for a second."" Murderer: ""K."""
"i made the mistake of watching a single zit popping video on youtube and now my recommendations screen is trying to make me barf"
"I just said ""bye - bye"" when I ended a phone call, and now I'm debating on if I should have my milk & cookies before or after recess."
"Our doctor's office painted their examination rooms the color 'Bran Muffin'. They hope to keep our attendance more regular."
"Old enough -Mom I'm finally 15, can I have a boyfriend? -No. -Can I use high Heels? -No. -Can I use a mini skirt? -No. -But why? -Because you're a man, Bob."
"She can't leave if you're wearing all of her clothes."
"two guys talking.... Guy one: I was having sex with my girlfriend and accidentally peed in her. Now she won't talk to me. Guy two: Sounds like urine trouble."