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Joke of the Day

"How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face. A joke from a 3 year old who thought it was hilarious, but probably didn't understand it."

"ME: hey guys what's the herps? HIM: u mean haps? M: oh, haha yea. what's the itch?I mean sitch H: uh M: hows it herpin? H: M: I have herpes"

"I hear the FDA just approved Bill Cosby.... Common side effects include drowsiness, loss of memory, taste of penis, and in rare cases, sore genitals."

"So two guys walk into a bar holding holding hands I think I'm at the wrong bar..."

"Have you guys heard of the joke about the electric chair? It's shocking."

"How many terrorist does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just hold a knife to its throat and threaten to execute it if it doesn't change itself"

"I just won an innuendo competition! I had to beat off some stiff competition though"

"A man is buying a banana, an apple and two eggs. The female cashier says: ""You must be single."" The man answers: ""Wow, how did you know?"" Cashier: ""Because you're ugly."""

"""Barista"" is Italian for BA in liberal arts."

"That one onion ring didn't end up in your french fries by accident. That's Burger King's way of flirting with you."