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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a cantaloupe who can't elope? A cantaloupe. The spelling is completely different..."

"Hope to get down to a weight where people don't think I have an opinion on movies."

"What's the most incestuous surname? Dickinson"

"Perfect Answer by Father. A little boy says, Dad, I've heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her.' Son,' says the dad. That happens everywhere."

"Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, and Bernie Sanders are on a plane. The plane crashes. Who survives? America"

"How do you make a redditor... Click on a post?"

"My wife said to me, ""Would you rather have sex with Angelina Jolie or Mila Kunis?"" I said, ""Yes."""

"Babe, you're like a camera. Everytime i look at you, i shutter."

"Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings too."

"So glad the new phone book arrived, because I hate texting the wrong number from the rotary phone in my Ford Model T."