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Joke of the Day

"Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, and Bernie Sanders are on a plane. The plane crashes. Who survives? America"

"It turns out I have my shirt on backwards and I'm wearing two different socks. I apologize for being so flamboyant with my heterosexuality."

"Funny teacher responses to ""Can I go to the bathroom?"" Forget the classic ""I don't know, can you?"""

"Watching cartoons with my son is awesome except for all the commercials & now his Christmas list has 26,724 things on it. Shit."

"What do you call a smoothie that came out too thick? A chunky. Credit to my dad this morning.."

"What's worse than a chauvinist man? A woman who doesn't know her place."

"10 Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed... ...One fell off and snapped his neck. Mama called the doctor and the doctor said: ""It's no use, this monkey is dead!"""

"Which is more promiscuous, a Northern girl or a Southern girl? A Northern girl says ""You can"" but a Southern girl says ""Y'all can""!"

"Explorers discover the holy grail only to find Kanye West drinking mountain dew out of it ""sup"" says Kanye"

"Sometimes cops don't believe it when I explain that my mom's dying wish was to keep her cremated ashes inside a bag of blow in my glove box."