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Joke of the Day

"Someone's been sleeping in my bed, said Papa Bear. Someone's been sleeping in MY bed, said Mama. Why don't u share a bed?! cried Baby Bear."

Next Joke
 
"If you combined all the female rap artists, what would you get? Nicki Melange"
"Fake moms- 'I never want to be away from my children' Real moms- 'You drop that pizza, I'll put you up for adoption'"
"[meeting] DIRECTOR: I want amazing CGI PRODUCER: Yes! D: A huge cast P: Agreed! D: Realistic family photos P: We don't have the budget"
"What do you say to change the atmosphere at a dinner party? ""If were all here, who's looking after Madeline?"""
"What would Jesus actually do? Probably ban nail guns"
"I'm currently on a 2 hour layover in St. Louis airport. I'm cold and Missourable."
"My 6 year old son told me this, ""what did one ocean say to the other?"". Nothing, he just waved."
"Oh look! A guy with ""Stand-Up Comic"" in his bio unfollowed me two seconds after I followed back. That's never happened before."
"If you ever see me on my death bed, please take me off my death bed & move me to my alive bed thx"
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