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Joke of the Day

"Oh look! A guy with ""Stand-Up Comic"" in his bio unfollowed me two seconds after I followed back. That's never happened before."

"Q: What bone will a dog never eat? A: A trombone."

"Got bucked off my high horse. Now I only have contusions of grandeur."

"The three undefeated NFL teams remaining are all named after cats. the Carolina Panthers, the Cincinnati Bengals, and the New England Cheet-ahs."

"Someone just threw sodium chloride at me. It was a salt."

"What's the difference between a Mexican joke and a black joke? Once you've heard Juan you've heard Jamal"

"Why do herb pickers have so many hobbies? They've got a lot of thyme on their hands"

"You think you had a bad day? Clams are getting chowdered. CHOWDERED."

"I joined a cribbage cult recently They practice peggin' rituals"

"I just discovered a subreddit called /r/abs Turns out it wasn't about arabic culture."