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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between plants and black men? Cells are found inside plants."

"Friend's Fb post: In search of a coat hanger My comment: Are you pregnant or are you locked out of your car? I've been on Twitter too long"

"if you ever want to witness an Oscar worthy performance, ask any person from twitter their follower count and watch them pretend to not know"

"I just bought some ""ribbed cotton tank t-shirts"" at WalMart. You'd think that'd be the one place on earth they'd call them wifebeaters."

"A nurse reaches into her pocket and finds a rectal thermometer... ""Ugh, some asshole has my pen"", she thought."

"I told my wife I was making venison for dinner.. She said ""oh, deer"""

"BowHead Whales! The problem with Bowhead whales is how narcissistic they are. They just won't stop thinking that they are Right!"

"What if the first tire-swing was left there as a warning to other tires?"

"I really have to hand it to short people Because they usually can't reach it anyways."

"Did you hear that Jenner accident was actually caused by the car? Bruce was having tranny problems."