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Joke of the Day
"Nothing says, ""I have a lot of free time,"" more than someone eating a pomegranate."
Next Joke
"Just killed a spider IN MY BED!! So if you need me, I'll be burning down my home and looking for a new place to live."
"What's the difference between Voldemort and Tyrion Lannister? One had a horcrux, the other had a whorecrush.."
"A little immature... Knock knock. Who's there? Europe. Europe who? No! You're a poo!"
"my cornflakes bring all the boys to my yard & theyre like this cereals hard damn right my cereals hard u should add milk so its not so sharp"
"What do pirates and strip clubs have in common? Neither can get enough booty"
"Her: Well, I know I told you that. Me: *closes eyes* Her: What are you doing? Me: Checking for it in my spam folder."
"There's nothing worse than child abuse but a close second is when someone describes an actor's performance as ""courageous."""
"Michael Jackson would be 54 today if he hadn't hired such a gifted nap specialist."
"What's the best Disney song to listen to while having a threesome? You've Got a Friend in Me"