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Joke of the Day

"My husband doesn't believe me that the Bible instructs him to make the coffee in the morning. It's there, clear as day. Hebrews."

"What do pancakes do when they are scared? They crepe themselves ;D"

"So the trick to getting my Dog to swallow Semen.. ..is coming on a treat."

"I'm still waiting for the day that I will actually use x2 + why +8 [(x + 2y 2 = a-z] + 2x 3 + (- 2z = 2. 4) + 10y 5Z 3= k= 9 in real life"

"Obama, The CIA, and Darpa walk into a bar... The End."

"Today, I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a wall. As he turned and sneered at me, I thought: 'that's a little condescending'."

"Did you hear about the guy who was obsessed with building HOV lanes through mountains? Classic case of carpool tunnel syndrome"

"Abortion clinics are awful. But their smoothies are to die for."

"""Knowledge is a weapon"" said Terry Goodkind which is why the cops can shoot you for holding a book"

"There was an episode of the Flintstones where a mechanic worked on Fred's car HEY FRED YOURE GETTING RIPPED OFF THERE IS NO ENGINE IN THERE"