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Joke of the Day
"Some men are born to greatness. Some have greatness thrust upon them. Me? I like waffles."
Next Joke
"If the world's fate ever hangs on my mom opening a picture mail on her phone in under ten minutes, we are all doomed."
"What do you call a stupid skeleton? Bonehead."
"My wife went ape-shit when she caught me doing shots with her sister. She knew we were doing them, she just never realized they were cum shots."
"What's the difference between a pussy and a cunt? The pussy is the cute fuzzy thing and the cunt is what it's attached to."
"Girls : ""Do I look fat?"" A girl asked a high-school boy, ""Do I look fat?"" The boy replied, ""Where?"" [teenage]"
"DOG 911: What's your emer- DOG: HE THREW A BALL BUT I CAN'T FIND IT DOG 911: He still holding it? DOG: YES! HOW'D HE FETCH IT BEFORE ME??"
"How'm I going to 80's montage myself out of this one?"
"What do you get when you mix a hippie and a yellow? Mello Yellow"
"Which profession has the worst sense of humour? Well, chiropodists like *corny* jokes. But opticians like them *cornea*."