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Joke of the Day

"When a woman tels you it's five minutes, then it's five minutes. Don't need to ask her every quarter of an hour."

"Top Five Accountant Taboos: 5. Unreconciled difference 4. Doesn't foot & crossfoot 3. No journal entry support 2. Cooking the books 1. Sex"

"What were Nazi turkeys forced to do each Thanksgiving? Goebel Goebbels."

"So a baby is named by his French, Chinese, and Redditor grandparents A. L'Mao"

"I start every conversation with my employees by saying, ""I shouldn't be telling you this"" just so I know they will listen."

"I like my coffee like my slaves... Free!"

"What does love mean to a tennis player? Nothing"

"Fred: What's that terribly ugly thing on your shoulders? Harry: Help! What is it? Fred: Your head!"

"Somebody left a baby at my front door today, and I have no idea what to do with it. I just hope it's gone by tomorrow."

"[pun] I wanted to be a personal trainer... But I was too scrawny and had to hand in my too weak notice. (Credits to Adrian, badass Chef)"