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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the snarky prisoner who smarted off to the guard on the elevator? He was a condescending con, descending."

"I am creating a new airline called 'The Wife'... Crash proof... It will never go down."

"Why did Batman climb the tree? He was looking for Robin's nest."

"Why girls want to be mermaids 1. No pants 2. No periods 3. Perfect hair 4. You get to lure men to their deaths 5. Free clam bra"

"How do Alabama parents teach their kids to put on their underwear? Yellow in the front, brown in the back."

"Did you hear about the Anorexic Jedi? She had to be force fed."

"What do Jews and Snorlax have in common? They always lie"

"What's fat, sweaty, and bad at cooking? My ex wife!"

"Cantaloupe... or Wontaloupe?"

"Why aren't midgets attention whores? Cause they know they're important."