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Joke of the Day

"You know what I don't get? Jobs."

"How do you cure depression? A gun."

"I'm so sick of seeing so many lazy abortion jokes on here Like can we just cut it out already?"

"You don't have to seduce me with restraining orders and joyrides on the hood of your car, you had me at. ""No, I was waving at my friend."""

"Harry Potter was walking down a hill jk rowling"

"I'm at my most spiderman when using a public restroom"

"Enhanced interrogation idea: If waterboarding isn't working, try having my mother brush their hair."

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I wouldn't pay to have a garbanzo bean on my face."

"What do you call smutty pictures of birds? Pornithography."

"Idea: suicide note Mad Libs (""Sad Libs"")"