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Joke of the Day

"What do you call smutty pictures of birds? Pornithography."

"I hurt my knee the other day... ...but I'm not sure if it was my low knee or my high knee."

"Me: How are you feeling Grandpa? Grandpa: Oh you know with my hands mostly."

"I really hate it when someone else creates something that I haven't had the chance to think of first..."

"Where do pigs park their cars? A porking lot."

"What's worse than locking your keys in your car in front of an abortion clinic? Going in and asking for a coat hanger."

"What do you call and Irish person who stays outside all night? Paddy O'Furniture"

"Judas: *Sips wine* Great, water again, very funny Jesus:HAHA I got you! Judas: So glad this is our last supper Jesus: what? Judas: what?"

"Whole Foods mixed up the labels on regular & vegan chicken salads. Vegans became suspicious when they experienced a fleeting moment of joy."

"Me: My tarot cards say that you're going to be in pain soon. Him: Ha! My Magic 8 Ball said No. *hurls Magic 8 Ball at him* Him: Ouch!"