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Joke of the Day

"Stalker status update: Good news-I'm not in your house. The bad news-I am UNDER your house and the tunnel is complete."

"Yo mama so fat... She makes Chow Yun-Thin. (sorry..reddit)"

"What is the difference between sex and LEGO? If you don't know you should stick to the LEGO!!"

"I bought a gallon of Wite-Out the other day.... Big mistake."

"911: what's your emerg- ME: I'VE BEEN SHOT 911: ...why would you interrupt me like that?"

"I had to study a book on the human digestive system today.... The ending was shit"

"The key to success is sincerity... Once you can fake that, you're golden."

"I keep making Freudian sex, I mean, slips."

"Why didn't the life guard save the hippy? He was too far out, man"

"Here's a FedEx joke http://imgur.com/UiGwU3e"