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Joke of the Day

"A joke about sword fighting I thought I invented a joke about sword fighting, but turns out it's just a riposte."

"What's the difference between hard and light? I can go to sleep with a light on."

"How many Irishmen does it take to change a lightbulb? One. He is drunk, and he tells the bulb to screw itself."

"The Defecator. ""That's not even a real Transformer."" Beat it, kid."

"Have a baby hold your cigarette for a minute and everybody loses their shit!"

"Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump or swim is already in the states."

"Tasted the best Borscht ever! It'll be hard to beet."

"Girlfriend and I broke up Now I have no friends. Sadly. A true dark joke."

"Stomach: I'm hungry. Brain: Chill out, dude, she's in a meeting. Stomach: I WILL NOW DEMONSTRATE A WHALE'S MATING CALL."

"I wonder if the prince was suspicious when Snow White's first baby was born a dwarf."