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Joke of the Day

"If Taylor Swift wasn't a famous singer, I bet she'd be crazy fucking annoying on Facebook."

"LIFE HACK tell the hotel you forgot your toothbrush. They don't even check, they just give you a brand new one!!! It's so sweet"

"Sex is like Maths: You add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray you don't multiply."

"There are 2 kinds of programmers Those who understand pointers and Segmentation fault (core dumped)"

"Judging from all the misery and carnage on my newsfeed, I'm assuming it's Monday."

"Inspecting mirrors is a job I could totally see myself doing."

"I almost always wear black. Not because I'm depressed or trying to be all dark, but because I'm single and don't want to separate laundry."

"A man walks into a bar. He goes ""I really shouldn't be walking through a building site"" and leaves."

"Don't be stingy when it comes to getting a circumcision. I got one cheap and it was a total rip-off."

"What's brown and runny? Usain Bolt"