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Joke of the Day

"What do an elephant and a Porsche 911 have in common? They both have their trunks in the front."

"The three American Marines that helped thwart the Terrorist Attack in France did something than no Frenchman ever has. Received Frances Highest Honor..."

"Why was Nancy always on top when the Reagans made love? Ronald Reagan always fucked up."

"""Act your age!"" I yell at my 11 year-old daughter as I put on my Captain America t-shirt."

"I have this theory that McDonald's hamburgers are actually made out of their employees. That's why they're always hiring."

"I am giving up eating red meats. I'm going cold turkey."

"I memorize Presidential Candidate speeches And Hillary's is hardest to get down PAC"

"Your college degree doesn't mean you're smart, it just means you're in debt."

"A guy wakes up in hospital after surgery and complains he can't feel his legs ""I know"" said the doctor. ""We had to amputate your arms"""

"Heroin really messed up my household... All the spoons are missing."