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Joke of the Day
"I'm not surprised you had a facelift..but it looks like you are."
Next Joke
"Boy the things I did to that tirimisu were obscene! It was sort of embarrassing when they asked me to go back to my own table though."
"I'm usually pretty inspired after watching a movie to try something I've just seen. [hunts for a movie about cleaning bathrooms]"
"An important phone call is something that occurs when there's no better excuse to ignore someone."
"The future Someone asked me the other day if I could see where I would be in 5 years. Come on man, I wear glasses. I don't have 2020 vision."
"Why do people with a gluten allergy usually make for pretty funny comedians? Because they always have silly acts."
"What do you call an alpacca that screams when it sees fire? A smoke aLaama."
"Robot Joke A robot walks into a bar. The bartender says ""we don't serve robots here"". The robot squints and says ""you will..."""
"I had some stir-fry delivered. I don't really like liver."
"So a Harley Davidson rolls into a bar and the bartender asks what it'd like. RUM RUM RUM RUM RUM RUM RUM"