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Joke of the Day
"I ignore politics because politicians clearly ignore me."
Next Joke
"How does Darth Vader know what Luke is getting for Christmas? He felt his presents."
"I make love like a machine. Unfortunately it's a two-stroke engine."
"Why is the homeless /r/anime mod still homeless? Every time someone tries to give him Shelter, he rejects it."
"Sex so good you see dead people."
"Isn't it annoying when you're having dinner with your in-laws and they don't exist because no one loves you enough to marry you?"
"All the world's a stage And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances, And one man in his time has many farts."
"Dank memes What came out of the dank meme's butt? Mountain doo doo"
"My wife's birthday is in two days, and she told me that she would be happy as long as I get her something with a lot of diamonds in it. She's gonna love this pack of playing cards."
"I was asking my comedian friend... for some advice on my act. I said ""I made a few cotton picking jokes but nobody found them funny"". He said ""It's simple, you need new material."""