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Joke of the Day
"What's slimy, green, and smells like bacon? Kermits finger."
Next Joke
"Why was the guitar teacher arrested? Because he was fingering minors."
"""Daddy, I was just in the bathroom peeing, nothing else. That's all, so you don't need to look."" - my 6yo, not sounding at all suspicious"
"If lovin' you is ROM... ...I don't wanna' read-write."
"So I got brainfreeze today.. I was just trying out the cryogenic storage box 2000"
"Schroedinger either gave the best or the worst presents."
"If asked at a job interview ""what's your biggest weakness"", test their tolerance for honesty by replying ""mortality"""
"My Russian friend came to visit me Vladislav? Baby Don't Hurt Me...."
"Quoting Monty Python and the Holy Grail is as easy as 1-2-5"
"What do you call an Asian woman who lives next to a data centre? Ping Lo."