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Joke of the Day
"What's the worst thing about eating a vegtable? Putting her back in the wheel chair..."
Next Joke
"Einstein quietly lays in bed next to a obviously disappointed partner.. After a few minutes of awkward silence he turns to her and says, ""You see, it was fast to you..."""
"*hears Siren's song* *eyes glaze* *walks in a trance ten miles* *breaks window to donut shop* I'm here, Mistress. *eats everything* *dies*"
"A good metaphor for today's youth is the book Peter Pan... Kids sneak out. Get high on dust together. Beat up handicapped man, and steal his boat."
"Men that know the difference between moist and wet, know the difference between failure and success"
"{Favorite Halloween Prank at Walmart} Old Lady: Your son is adorable 4 yr. old: *running down aisles* Me: Mam' My son died 10 years ago."
"Why does Peter Pan always fly? Because he Neverlands! You're welcome."
"How did the stoner propose to his girlfriend? Marriage, you wanna?"
"Why did a Mexican man throw his wife off a cliff? Tequila."
"Why did the creator of 9gag call it that? Because that was how many dicks he could fit in his mouth before he gagged."